Special Event

I can hardly make myself believe it, but my granddaughter, Courtney, is really and truly going to graduate from high school a year from now. I knew it, we have talked about school and college interests and other related subjects but, today, it became a reality. Why? Because during a casual conversation with Tracey she told me that she was trying to get away from work to meet Courtney at the studio for her senior picture appointment, and if I wanted to observe to feel free to come. At that moment it didn't register to me that this was a special event so I really didn't listen to the directions nor the photographer's name. Then, as if a light went on in my head I wheeled my car around, got on the road to Hendersonville and began to call to find out where to find them. I made it after several wrong turns and attempts to find the studio. I am so glad that I did. I was privileged to see Courtney in the drape picture and two of the casual shots. There were many photos to be taken - a couple of casual outfits and even a soccer uniform (complete with soccer ball). I have no idea when they finished. The thing that made this so special to me was, not just that this is the beginning of a lot of really special events that will take place in the next year even though that is important. The most special thing about it was watching Courtney and Tracey interacting through the entire process. Courtney, even though she appears to be very independent, and she is, really relied upon her mother's opinion of her hair, the way her blouse looked, was her jewelry okay and many other small things that showed this very special bond that the mother and daughter share. That is what is most important. The bond between mothers and daughters is such a beautiful thing. I have some friends who are not bonded in love and respect and admiration for each other and I have to say that I feel very sorry for them. I know what people say about me "you never had a son so you just don't know " and they are correct. Maybe if a son had been born to me I would be just as close to him. I just know that my mother always said that the adage of "your son's a son till he takes a wife, but your daughter's your daughter all of your life" hangs pretty true for most of the women with sons that I know.

My daughter, Kim, will be having surgery in a couple of days and I wish that I could swap places with her. However, that is not the way it will be so I will just have to hand her over to God and He will take care of her during the surgery. Then, I will go and take care of her during her recovery and it will be a labor of love. Actually, it will be just a turn around of favors - for many years she has taken care of me, my wants, my needs and sometimes anticipated my wants and needs before I did. During the time that she will not be able to communicate on her Blog I will post daily information here so that everybody can know how she really is. So, if you will just log on here I will keep you up-to-date as best that I can.

LEGACY

Today, while watching all of the hoopla over Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson I heard the word Legacy mentioned over and over. The legacy that she leaves is strength, etc. The legacy that he leaves is his influence in the music and entertainment industry. So I thought to myself what legacy will I leave? I really can't say what that will be but I can say what I hope it will be. I hope that my children will be proud of the way I lived my life. I hope that my children will look back at their childhood and say it was good growing up in our family. Sure I made a bunch of mistakes but as I have said before everything that I did while rearing my girls was what I thought was right at the time. Looking back on it I'm not so sure it was but I thought it was. Frankly, I think a pretty good job was done because they are a good bunch of women that are producing generations of children and grandchildren. Sometimes I am amused to see and hear them doing and saying things that I said to them. They even say "because I said so that's why" and that was something they each have told me that they would never say to their children. History does repeat itself and that's a fact. I hope that I will leave a legacy of humor and good fun because my life has been a real fun trip. Being married to Billy Cline was a road with lots of turns and twists and never dull for sure. We weathered a bunch of storms and we walked in a lot of sunshine. It is quite a feat to see a guy in junior high school that you think is great and as mother would say "I set my cap for him", and had him in my life for many years. I hope that it will be said that I could put a meal together at the drop of a hat and enjoyed serving friends and family. I hope that it will be said that I loved unconditionally. I hope that it will be said that I was a true friend to my friends. When we are travelling the road of life we do and say and act impulsively sometimes and goodness knows we all wish we could take back some of our words and actions. But as Meg Ryan said in the movie, When Harry Met Sally, "once they're out there, they're out and you can't take them back". Kinda like toothpaste - once you squeeze the tube and the toothpaste comes out there just is no way of putting it back. I hope my legacy will be that my words were pretty good most of the time. For now I think I have said enough and I hope not too much. What about your legacy? Think about it as you make decisions. When you are gone your legacy will still be here. Scary isn't it?

THE TRIP THAT TOPS THEM ALL

My last post told you of the upcoming trip to Destin, Florida with Kim and Patrick. Today I will pretend that I am in Trip Education 101 and report what I gained in knowledge from the trip. I learned that three people can cram an awful lot of "stuff" in a trunk of a car, including a guitar, when packing for a 5 day trip. I learned that a scrambled egg with crisp bacon and a biscuit sure tastes a lot better at Cracker Barrel on a trip than it does in my kitchen. I learned that if the person holding the driving instructions dozes off for 10 minutes the driver will miss an exit and a turn-around has to be accomplished. I learned that unpacking all of that "stuff" takes a lot of time and energy and makes you wonder just what you were thinking of to bring 10 shirts, 4 pairs of slacks, a couple of other outfits, 4 bathing suits, 5 pairs of sandals not to mention all of the "unmentionables". I learned that when you go to the Winn-Dixie to buy a "short list of things that we will use" it adds up to $100.00 real quick - and we didn't even buy ice cream. I learned that margaritas made by a grandson and served at the pool taste better than any I ever had. I learned that watching Patrick and Sue Evans para sail over the Gulf was fun, exciting and something that was fun for them and a big "no-no" for me. I don't like heights and especially if my feet are dangling down over miles and miles of water. I learned that sitting on the beach under an umbrella and walking in the sand still gives me such pleasure and such joy. I guess that the greatest lesson I learned was that to be blessed to spend time with my daughter and my grandson from morning until night for 5 days is a priceless gift that can never be repaid nor forgotten. We talked and laughed and joked and teased and ate that good seafood. Patrick made lunch every day and served us on the patio and I'm telling you that a ham sandwich, pickles, chips and coke never tasted that good before nor will it ever taste that good again. I learned that my daughter, Kim, is the strongest person I know. She pushed herself beyond all endurance to shop, swim, go to restaurants, take a million pictures of every single event and never complained nor changed any plans to accommodate her pain. She was there to take it all in and that she did. We all did. Oh yes, one more thing I learned - it makes you very nervous to have a driver going 75 miles an hour, texting friends, reading messages, dipping and spitting all with headphones on playing crazy music. However, I will say that he got us there and he got us back and here I am telling you that of all my trips to Destin, Florida through the years, all the memories that have been made there, all the events that have taken place there, this little 5 day day trip with Kim and Patrick just tops them all. The thing I really learned is to Carpe Diem - Seize the Day - Everyday that the Lord gives us is a gift to be savored.

RAMBLING THOUGHTS

Today is VACATION EVE and am I excited? You bet. Will I have a good time? No doubt about it. Corinne has checked the weather website and it looks like 90 and 88 degrees all week with a 10% chance of rain. There is always a 10% chance of rain there so who cares? Not I. I am serving notice to the Shrimp in Florida to look out because I intend to pig out on shrimp. Can't wait to go to The Back Porch and have seafood nachos! Most of all I will get to spend five entire days with Kim and Patrick. I can not remember ever having that privilege before. We began, may years ago, talking about Kim, Patrick and I taking a trip to Cancun. Patrick had no idea where that was nor did he care but he was willing to go. We never made it to Cancun but Destin is just as exciting to us and also we are familiar with the town and what it has to offer so it all worked out for the best. You know, things really always work out for the best if we are willing to wait and be patient and trust that it will. That is the hardest thing in life to do - wait and be patient. I was never good at it but as I grow older and, hopefully, wiser I see the virtue in waiting and being more patient. The many times that I have jumped to conclusions and planned and thought about what might happen usually turned out quite different and I could have saved all that energy. I see younger people making all of these elaborate plans for what they are going to do and how they are going to tend to things and I smile to myself and think "maybe so but maybe not". We are not able to look ahead and see what the end result to a problem is going to be - that is God's ability. I'm not saying we should just sit back and let things happen without doing our part and planning and getting ready for situations is part of that scenario, however, we are not the ones that make the final decisions. When I used to watch The Millionaire and he would say with such authority "is that your final answer" I would think that they were being awful hard and leaving no chance for change. It had to be that way on the TV show, but it doesn't have to be that way in life. As I have said in this blog before, the only constant thing in the world is change. Aren't we glad that God gives us the ability to change our ways, our way of thinking, our desires and our total outlook on life? If you use another synonym for change it could be maturity. The more we mature the more we change.

This week I have been privileged to have Emily with Anni and Maddux and Leslie with Connor, Cannon and Cord to come and spend time at my house between swimming lessons and we had lunch together. It is so good to be able to sit and listen to the children as they interact with each other and the things they say and do. The days of hearing "that's mine", "he hit me", "I don't like him/her" seem to be over. Now they play together, watch movies together, talk to each other and each one is maturing at a very fast rate - even Cord as he struggles to keep up with the others. I have observed them hugging each other spontaneously which I think is remarkable.

Yesterday I went with Kim to Vanderbilt for her PET Scan and going down that hall and into that area was like going back in time. The times that I made that route with Billy. There is such a kind, sweet atmosphere among the workers there. Kim was treated with such warmth even when she told the nurse that she had better get the blood with one stick. Talk about pressure! It worked and she only had one stick and we all had a good laugh. I don't know what the test will produce in the way of knowledge but I do know this that whatever it is and whatever has to be done will be taken care of. I know that God is in control in Heaven and Dr. Netterville is in control here and Kim's family will circle up, hold hands, count off like we do when we have our family gatherings and every single member will be there to pray her through.

FIX IT

I haven't written on this blog in quite a while. As a matter of fact I haven't done much of anything in quite a while. As you know, and as everybody knows. when you become a mother one of the responsibilities that comes with that position is to "fix it". Maybe it is a boo boo on the finger that is held up and needs Neosporin ointment and a band-aid, maybe it is a bloody nose that needs a cold wet rag and a few minutes of time, or maybe it is a break-up with a boyfriend that needs some arms to hold and a shoulder on which to shed tears - whatever the case may be moms are supposed to be able to "fix it". When Kim was diagnosed with that dreaded C word I realized that I just can't fix it. So, I took to the sofa - wrapped up in a soft blanket and just slept and wept and did nothing. I cancelled appointments that I had. I let phone calls go to the answering machine. I would go sit in my swing for hours and do absolutely nothing. Boy, was I in the bluest funk. All of this time, however, I was praying. I prayed for Kim to have complete healing. I prayed for me to have strength and guess what.....I woke up Saturday morning with a completely new attitude, a stronger body and mind and it was like I had the promise that is given in Isaiah 40:29 "He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak" It goes on to promise that "we will soar on wings like eagles and will run and not grow faint." Prayer answered. Hallelujah!!! So now that I am back into the land of the living I am still distraught that I can't fix it, but I am here for whatever service I can give. A tube of Neosporin and a band aid won't fix Kim's disease but God is up there in Heaven with the biggest old tube of love and grace to pour on her and that is what will "fix it".

From reading Kim's blog this morning it sounds like those girls of mine sure did have a great time last night - dinner, flowers, bracelet and I can imagine the talk, talk, talk and laughter mixed in and also some tears. They really enjoy being together and even though it take a lot of planning to make everybody's schedule fit the event they manage to do it and the effort is worth the work. They needed this time together, sans Mom, and they really celebrated Kim in a huge way. I will go to Kim's house today after Bible Study and eat the leftovers, see the flowers and admire the bracelet.

This will be a busy week. Lots to do because on Sunday Kim, Patrick and I will head to the beach for a few days of sun, fun, and all the shrimp in Destin.

Carpe Diem with love to all